The #1 Secret Most Parents Keep and Why You Shouldn’t

The other day my son walked in and was complaining about his dad. He felt like his dad was being impatient. At first I didn’t know what to say. I was having flashbacks of the moments that I had been impatient earlier that day. Without thinking much about it I bent down so we were eye to eye and I put my hand on his shoulder. I said, “Buddy, Dad and I aren’t perfect. We make mistakes. We’re doing best we can”.

The conversation was more powerful than I expected. Isn’t the truth always powerful? The truth squashes the lies we tell ourselves. As I was thinking over this conversation later that night I realized that there were a couple lessons that were learned in that brief interaction.

Lesson #1: Perfection is Unattainable

I’m not perfect and I was never intended to be perfect. Sending the message that I’m perfect minimizes grace. Perfection says grace isn’t enough. God’s Word says otherwise. The perfect life will one day come, but not this side of heaven. I look forward to the life that no longer includes struggling with my mistakes and the mistakes of those around me. For now, I want grace to be that soft place to land when I fall short. A soft place for my kids to land when they fall short.



“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you,

for my power is made perfect in weakness.”  1Corinthians 12:9a



Lesson #2: Remove Unrealistic Expectations

Confessing that I’m not a perfect parent removes unrealistic expectations. Perfection is an unrealistic expectation. It’s a lie we tell ourselves and try to sell others. Maintaining the fallacy of perfection is damaging to myself and my children. It misleads others into believing perfection is attainable. I don’t want my children to buy into the lie that if they try hard enough they won’t make mistakes. That leads to a life of constant striving, never resting. It leads to a life of self-reliance instead of grasping on to grace. Nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes. Let’s aim for our best rather than perfection. Grasp onto grace.


“I don’t want my children to buy into the lie that if they

try hard enough they won’t make mistakes.”


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